there are a lot of reasons. for one thing, you can’t be good with yourself if you’re not living an honest life. by not coming out, you’re denying the people around you (and yourself) the opportunity to get to know who you really are and love you for that person, you know? i also believe that gay people have to go through the coming out process in order to understand one day who they are in the world as a sexual minority, and that’s only something you will learn by going through the experience.
I don’t think people love me. They love versions of me I have spun for them, versions of me they have construed in their minds. The easy versions of me, the easy parts of me to love.